Tuesday, July 4, 2017

I can only Imagine ♪

I'm really tired today. So it's really hard to be grateful. So I'm only going to list two things.

1. Nerds. I like nerds. They taste good. WEll I like all candy in general.

2. Rain. It's nice. It's soothing. It's cleansing.

I have work tomorrow. Computer training. I wish my manager would call me. I don't like not knowing my schedule. God help me. God help us all. This has been the longest week of my life.

Monday, July 3, 2017

Who am I ♩

1. Family. I seriously sometimes wish I was born into a different family, but at the end of the day, when I'm down and lost, my family has my back. Besides, they're the only ones willing to put up with my constant chattering. :0 Go family~

2. Pink lemonade. I forgot just how tasty concentrate was. It's delicious. Thank you creator of...dang, I forgot the name of it. But there's another flavor that's fruit punch. But it's not as tasty. I got it from Burger King. It was worth it. Even though the bacon cheeseburgers were not. They were so tiny! I got ripped off. That tiny burger was like 400 calories too! Man.

3. Friends. Okay, so I really don't have any friends. But there's this one girl from junior high who is really sweet and so she befriended me and is able to stand through all of my awkwardness, and I love her. She's wonderful. I love people like her and I wish there were more people like that in the world. I do wish for a friend though. You know a bff. That's something I've always dreamed of. Someone that I can share secrets with. Whine to. Celebrate with. Talk about guys with. Talk about manga with. Talk about korean dramas. Go eat lunch with. Go places with. Sigh. A girl can dream.

4. God. I love Him. I really do. Sometimes I forget that bc my life is full of unpredictable woohoos, but other days like today I'm just filled with such a profound love that He loves me. I mean. How can he? But he does. And that's just...overwhelmingly...awesome.

5. Extrovert people. Please adopt me. And for those who have or even just taken the time to talk to me, thank you.

Oh and I'd just like to say to those people that spit gum on the sidewalk. That's not very nice. I stepped in it and now my ballet shoes are messed up. Being a crappy person to make other people feel as crappy as you, just makes you a crappier person. Please stop this. Stop it at once you gum spitting on sidewalk people.

That's also really disgusting. Idk where your nasty mouth has been and now it's on the bottom of my shoe. :O eeeewwwwwwww. not good, fools.

Please let me sleep, I'm tired.

Sunday, July 2, 2017

♮ And when the night falls the lonely heart calls

You know. I thought about it. Just living with my family forever. I mean. Think about it. Besides for in American it being odd that you live with your parents. I would save money on rent. I would always have someone around if I needed them. I would be saving money.

No really. I would save so much money by just splitting the cost of living at home with my parents.

But. Today again reminded me why I'd rather have my own space.

I can eat food that I want without people complaining. I can sleep whenever I want to. I can buy whatever I want to. Granted, I'll have to pay bills, but I think the freedom will be worth it. I'm so tired of living here. I'm so tired of arguing ALL the time.

Now, I sound like an ungrateful brat. Which I probably am. Sorry. I'm trying to fix that. That's actually why I made this blog. It was supposed to be a gratitude journal. You know positivity and good vibes. So. We'll go back to that bc I obviously regressed in the time that I wasn't on here.

1. Food. That was really good noodles. And the meat was so tender and so were the carrots. Oh my gosh. It's all your fault that I weigh so much. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TASTE SO GOOD??? And why do you have to trigger the reward center of my brain so that I crave more????
2. Disney. I love Mulan. The "Make a Man" song is so catchy and motivating.
3. That I'm done with school. This morning I was cleaning my room and basically I'm dumping everything. All those notes. And I mean, ALL THOSE NOTES, are going in the recycle bin (save the planet, kids!).
4. The internet. So I can google diy things. bc buying things is expensive. Especially for someone who isn't working.
5. Spontaneous extroverts. I love them. Bc as an introvert I love it when people talk to me, bc I don't have the courage to talk to them. Please talk to me. I'm lonely. And if you do, thank you. It makes me feel like a human when you do. :)

Hmmmmm. It's time to put new goals up! lol. long term and short term.
1. Finish putting all those wires in my room onto cyclinders so it's more organized.
2. Be able to do okay at orientation tomorrow! I'm scared! These will be my potential coworkers! I'm gonna fake it till I make it hardcore tomorrow!
3. long term goal: work hard now. with a lot of overtime. so that I can retire early and go on vacation to see lots of new places and eat good food and meet new people. that's my end game right there. hopefully my hard work will pay off.

Fears I should work on conquering:
1. Receiving critique. I should take what they say into consideration instead of pretending to listen and dumping away their information and crying about being critiqued. I have soft skin. I wish I had thicker skin. But I'm working on it.