Sunday, July 2, 2017

♮ And when the night falls the lonely heart calls

You know. I thought about it. Just living with my family forever. I mean. Think about it. Besides for in American it being odd that you live with your parents. I would save money on rent. I would always have someone around if I needed them. I would be saving money.

No really. I would save so much money by just splitting the cost of living at home with my parents.

But. Today again reminded me why I'd rather have my own space.

I can eat food that I want without people complaining. I can sleep whenever I want to. I can buy whatever I want to. Granted, I'll have to pay bills, but I think the freedom will be worth it. I'm so tired of living here. I'm so tired of arguing ALL the time.

Now, I sound like an ungrateful brat. Which I probably am. Sorry. I'm trying to fix that. That's actually why I made this blog. It was supposed to be a gratitude journal. You know positivity and good vibes. So. We'll go back to that bc I obviously regressed in the time that I wasn't on here.

1. Food. That was really good noodles. And the meat was so tender and so were the carrots. Oh my gosh. It's all your fault that I weigh so much. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TASTE SO GOOD??? And why do you have to trigger the reward center of my brain so that I crave more????
2. Disney. I love Mulan. The "Make a Man" song is so catchy and motivating.
3. That I'm done with school. This morning I was cleaning my room and basically I'm dumping everything. All those notes. And I mean, ALL THOSE NOTES, are going in the recycle bin (save the planet, kids!).
4. The internet. So I can google diy things. bc buying things is expensive. Especially for someone who isn't working.
5. Spontaneous extroverts. I love them. Bc as an introvert I love it when people talk to me, bc I don't have the courage to talk to them. Please talk to me. I'm lonely. And if you do, thank you. It makes me feel like a human when you do. :)

Hmmmmm. It's time to put new goals up! lol. long term and short term.
1. Finish putting all those wires in my room onto cyclinders so it's more organized.
2. Be able to do okay at orientation tomorrow! I'm scared! These will be my potential coworkers! I'm gonna fake it till I make it hardcore tomorrow!
3. long term goal: work hard now. with a lot of overtime. so that I can retire early and go on vacation to see lots of new places and eat good food and meet new people. that's my end game right there. hopefully my hard work will pay off.

Fears I should work on conquering:
1. Receiving critique. I should take what they say into consideration instead of pretending to listen and dumping away their information and crying about being critiqued. I have soft skin. I wish I had thicker skin. But I'm working on it.


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