~And I don't really care if nobody else believes
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me~
chu chu chu.
This is probably the most important part bc I should never, ever forget the little things in life. I have many, many things to be grateful for. And I should dwell on those, instead of what I don't have.
The harshest critic, I think, is myself. I expect a lot from myself. I expect myself to be the smartest one, the most attractive one, the most liked one...but...I should look at things from others views to.
To my mom: I'm the most beautiful child in the world. The smartest.
Lol. I'm not bragging I swear. It's just I get into moods when I look at pictures or those reflective moments where I compare myself to others and it's just...DON'T. Why do that? It doesn't do anything but bring myself down and if I do bring myself up, it's only by bashing on other people.
It's just. I'm grateful for today. Bc I forget it a lot. But at least there's one person in the world, who thinks the world of me. I'm grateful that I mean something to someone.
Looking forward to:I thought I needed someone who would be forceful. By that I mean uninhibited and just straight up pursues me...but that's not my style. I don't like that. It makes me feel attacked. You know like an animal you can't just start by picking it up and squeezing it and hugging it and start loving on it. No. No bro. No. You got to take your time developing a bond with it. And then you can start to casually, gently, approach. Lol. yes. That's what I need. To be cautiously approached. Then once deemed safe, and no longer a stranger, then I may start to open up more. Or something like that. Don't attack me. Don't just relentlessly push your friendship onto me. While friends are nice...I'm not quite sure how to deal with you.
Looking forward to:
getting stuff done. It's starting to wind down. Got to get all my affairs into order.