Monday, March 28, 2016

🎼 Wait, I'm wrong Should have done better than this Please, I'll be strong ♪ ( ᐛ )و

I'm seriously running on ~2 hours of sleep right now and so all I really want to do is fall asleep. I was gonna take a nap now in my car before my next class started but it's sooo hot, I think I would have suffocated in the car(even with the windows rolled down). I'm actually writing at school right now, bc I'm not sure if I'll be able to stay awake once I get home. It's been a loo~oong first day back. I can't believe I forgot I had a test; lol, so last night into this morning until 5 o'clock(let me remind you in the morning!) was spent cramming my brain as much as possible. And then I tried to concentrate in class to study, but I was holding in my cough...I think I got this other kid sick, so I didn't want to cough, bc then the kid'll remember it was me that gave her the cough...lol, does that even make sense??

Anyways, but since the teacher "trusts" us and stuff so we don't have to ask to go to the bathroom, I really just wanted to get up and go cough in the bathroom where I wouldn't bother anyone, but for some reason all of today, the teacher sat behind me and lectured ALL THROUGHOUT CLASS!!! And, I have anxiety, so I could never find a good time to stand up and open the door(it makes a loud click and people ALWAYS stare), so I spent the whole class concentrating on keeping my cough inside, but that's not good bc then it was hard to breath and the mucus made my breathing wheezy and so finally we had a break and so that's when I coughed. Lol, but the point was that I didn't get any cramming in after I went to sleep.

I went into that test blind and came out dazed. But...I think I did the math before and I can afford to fail a test(just not epically fail it(which I'm afraid I did)). But, if I do, then I have to seriously do well on the other tests. I'm kind of mad at myself bc I totally knew it's systolic/diastolic but for some reason I kept questioning myself!!! (* ̄m ̄) This happened with the last test too. On the basic questions, I question whether if I really know what I know and I always end up getting it wrong...lol, I need to stop thinking on tests!

It was hard to fall asleep too, bc I couldn't remember what time my class was, so I tried to search for it on my phone, but the school's website won't work on mobile devices. So I sat there, thinking, surely I wrote down the right time to take the test. But then...when I closed my eyes, I couldn't sleep. My eyes wouldn't stay shut even though my brain was all SLEEEP NOW, YOU'LL HAVE 2.5 H OF SLEEP IF YOU JUST FALL ASLEEP NOW. That continued on until, if I seriously didn't fall asleep then I would only have 2 hours of sleep left. So I just got up. Went to the living room to get my laptop and looked up the website again. I was right...lol. I seriously don't trust myself.

So with that clear, I went to sleep. (´〜`*) zzzzz Only to have that BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP wake me up. Lol, I turned it off. I swear I just closed my eyes and then BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. Lol, I turned it off again. This happened until it was 7. I had actually set 5 alarm clocks that night bc I knew that if I didn't I would have overslept. I seriously was sleeping until that last alarm. My eyes have never looked so bloodshot as they have this morning.

I swear I could have been the poster child for drugs. Not only that, but I put on my sunscreen and it paled me out so bad, I seriously looked like a vampire...with bloodshot eyes(and not a hot one). And my hair was doing this antigravity defying thing and...I finally just looked in the mirror and said: You sit in the back...no one's gonna look at you anyways, so MOVE IT!

Today was actually the closest I had cut to being late to class. I ran from the parking lot up those stupid stairs(jk, it makes me feel a sense of accomplishment every time I take the stairs bc I know I'm doing my body good!). Lol, and I wasn't even late. Man, sometimes I just thank God for being on my side. I swear I hit every red light, was behind every slow driver that was out there. Not only that...passengers have the right of way always, but these kids...they can't drive to save their lives. I'd rather not get run over so if a car doesn't look like it's gonna stop even though I need to cross, I just stand there and let it go. LET IT GOOOO~~~

something positive:
Yesterday was one of my friend's birthday. So last night(when I should have been studying) I was preparing a gift. Part of the gift was that I promised to give a piece of my brother's cookie cake. This was SO HARD TO DO. My brother has been guarding that thing with his life. Every time I tell him, he should eat less to savor it, he just hisses at me and is "IT'S MINE! I DO WHAT I WANT!!". lOL, it' hilarious, but I didn't want to go back on my promise. I feel bad, but in return I told him I wouldn't eat any of the cake. He kind of glared at me, but there's still a chunk(a small chunk) left. So this morning I cut a little piece and put it as part of the present. It's nice having a little brother. Lol, all siblings are jewels. (❁´▽`❁)*✲゚* So anyways, what I wanted to say was that giving gifts is really nice.

It makes me happy to give things. Lol. It's just hard when you have nothing to give. And I can't stand when someone opens the present from me, in front of me...lol, it's so awkward for some reason. But, there were no complaints. Everything went well, and seriously it puts me in the mood for Christmas!!!!!!! (๑^ں^๑)

Um, so something from yesterday that I forgot to put in...I watched the Macau episode of running man and it was seriously THE BEST EPISODE EVER!!! They did bungee jumping and every time someone jumped, I got goose pimples. It was SOOOO AMAZING!!! I told my brother I would do that if I was there. He said the only way I would do it is if he pushed me. Lol, and he said he would!!! (.=^・ェ・^=) Lol, at least I would have bungee jumped. They were all so brave and seriously made me have the feels again for running man. I love that show soooo much. I get to watch the new episode today too!! And the new episode of WGM china(c eng subs) with song ji hyo+chen bolin is supposed to be out today!!!!! So I may splurge and watch both today when I get home!!!! YAYYY!!!!

something accomplished:
I got 12,466 steps in today!!! And the day isn't even over yet!!! ♡✧( ु•⌄• ). I'm quite sure that's a record for me. So WOOT WOOT!! And this post today...I might as well have wrote a novel. I had a lot to rant. Oh and I want to say to the past me. DUDE, YOU ROCK AT WRITING. In my last class(teach is pretty chill but she basically just reads the powerpoints so paying attention is pointless), so I was going through my google drive and reading some of my old fanfiction(never posted), and dude, I freaking had golden ideas. The only problem was that none of them were ever finished. They were literally just snippets of amazing plots. I want to finish them and make them stories someday. I love writing SOO much.  Man I'm proud of myself for preparing the gift though. I mean I'm a pretty lazy person, but wait now that I think about it...I could have just spent my time on the gift bc I was procrastinating on hw...lol. W/e.

The steps actually came from me walking to the optometrist. It was about an hour walk to and back. Traffic was ridiculous with the little walking man sign never showing up. I even pressed it a couple times bc it felt like it was taking too long. And they don't leave the walking sign on for very long. I'm already a slow person, but I had to job across and even then it was blinking don't walk when I was only halfway across the street. It wasn't too hot though so it was a nice walk. Glad they have sidewalks!!!

Got my glasses and they fit when I put them on at the office, but I just tried them on again and they keep sliding off my face :( They're stylish though!!! :P lol or should I say nerdy? They remind me of the past me...it's nice. and like I said contacts kill my freaking eyes. Though I don't know if the prescription is right considering I wore my contacts when I went to get them, so contacts+glasses=blurry world. Lol, but still clearer than if I didn't wear either. (*⌒▽⌒*)θ~♪

something to look forward to tomorrow:
I think I'm picking my friend up tomorrow so I get to talk to her since I haven't during all of spring break. Lol. Like I said I'm bad at communication. I can go years without calling/texting a friend but if we meet up, it'll be like the years we hadn't been meeting never even happened. I don't know why it's like that...

And I'll probably walk to the eye doctor place tomorrow again to get my glasses fixed, bc I can't wear them like this. They'll just keep sliding off and become broken. So yay, healthy me!!! (^▽^)/ ʸᵉᔆᵎ

Ⓗⓐⓟⓟⓨヾ(◍’౪`◍)ノ゙

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