Tuesday, April 12, 2016

(-‿◦) Easy come, easy go That's just how you live, oh ♫

something positive about the day:
Wore my new shirt that I bought last week!! Lol, I don't really like when I see people wearing the clothes that I wear which is why I usually don't wear new clothes, but it was a red shirt and I was really in the mood for red, so...yup.

Hehe, I woke up at 10:40 today! That's freaking awesome! Bc, I didn't sleep till about 1 last night. It was so chilly and I wear shorts to bed so...brrrr.

I ate grilled chicken breast sandwich! Well, half. and it was goood! Drank my dose of milk today too. Trying to stay hydrated.

what I had accomplished:
FINISHED MY NOTES FOR THE TEST MONDAY!!! Yay! Now, I just got to get studying!!! I made gift boxes! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6TUvYCrdvM&nohtml5=False He's really good at explaining and I just used this old calender that I had that has gorgeous pictures!

something I look forward to the next day:
Wednesday is my do nothing day!! And no partner class tomorrow!!!

So, just a bit of a rant today.

My friend that I've known from elementary school told me she had been bullied in junior and part of high school... I was all ଽ (৺ੋ ௦ ৺ੋ )৴ who the eff are these people? And where the eff was I? I was blessed with an ok school life. Didn't have a lot of friends, sometimes I didn't have any, but I was never bullied. I honestly didn't know what to say so I apologized. I mean, I felt bad bc I was her friend and I didn't even know anything. She said it happened when I wasn't there...but it just makes me feel horrible. I want to put it off as kids being kids, but...it's things like calling people names and insulting them for simply being themselves that makes people have trust issues. Words freaking hurt and I think that's one of my issues too.

I'm not gonna lie. I did something in junior high that I'm pretty much haunted by nowadays. There was a guy on the bus and he told me to sit with him and I did on the way up but then this other girl was basically trashtalking him and told me not to sit with him, stupid me didn't say anything to defend the guy and just sat there with the trashtalking girl. and I just...if I could go back in time I swear I would karate chop myself. Seriously, one of my most ashamed moments. I was basically the same as the trashtalking girl bc I didn't say anything. Seriously you wanna talk about peer pressure, that was mine. I didn't get asked to do drugs or smoke, but it was people talking bad about others and then they would look to me and I'd just be "..." One of my pet peeves now prob cause of this incident.

Also one of the reasons I find it so hard to make friends with the people in my class. They literally just sit around and talk bad about others...ugh, I'm not going there. They can do what they want with their lives. I mean they look happy enough, so whatever. I'm probably already their enemy for not joining in.

But that's one among 3 incidents that have basically tied up my mouth around people I don't know. I'm so scared that something I say is going to offend or hurt others that I've become resigned to just not saying anything. I mean I've always been a quiet child, but now I'm almost a silent child. If it wasn't for my family, I could literally go months without speaking. Lol.

Something happy...hmmm oh! An interesting fact. Eventually the sun will eat the earth! Lol, I imagine it'll be something similar to pacman...lol, probably not, but I really loved playing the game pacman. My brother and I would stay up trying to beat the arcade version and get a higher lvel on the ps2. Man, I miss those days!

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