Wednesday, April 20, 2016

I'm running and not quite sure where to go..,•*¨*•♫

It's been roughly a month since I've started and, I'm not sure how and if there's any difference in the me today and the me from a month ago. I mean, I can't say that I'm happier. I can't say that I have more friends. I can't say that life is finally going in the right direction. There wasn't really an epiphany of difference.

Maybe I was expecting too much. Maybe I didn't do this correctly. Maybe I screwed this up. Maybe it's too soon to tell?

Maybe I am a bit more positive. I used to have a twitter where every other post would either be, "I hate this class", "I hate my life" or "I hate so and so" or "This is so annoying", but I haven't really posted anything on the twitter since I've started this. There was that one incidence where the teacher made me do something I was uncomfortable with doing and so I tweeted ~5 straight tweets about how he needed to get an attitude check. Lol. But, when I reread what I wrote on that twitter, it made me realize just how much I needed a change.

It was depressing. It was like a cry for help. It was like my thinking was that if my life was so hateful, everyone else's life should be just as hateful...which is really trashy of me. :X

I read an article somewhere that negative behaviour is contagious...but there's also articles about how positive behaviour is also contagious...if both of them are "catchable" shouldn't we be spreading the good one around?

Raspberry mojito is a kind of cocktail drink I think. The cupcakes tasted ok, but I realized that lime and cupcakes don't go very well together. I mean the cupcake tasted fine, but the frosting was where there was a lot of lime and the sweet and sour just didn't mix that well for me. :? bleck. I'll still eat it, of course, :P, but I wonder what I'm going to do with the other packet of icing...

The granola bars turned out ok...I found the coconut after I finished making them(lol gonna use them for the rest of the 3 packets), and they were a bit dry and I didn't follow the recipe at all, lol, but it turned out edible, so yay! xD I really don't like instant reminds me of baby food...which I have, it was my brother's and I was wondering how he could eat the stuff...poor babies...

I can see the bottom of my closet now...which is quite an accomplishment considering how much clothes were piled down there. I wonder why I keep shopping when I obviously have enough clothes to last me for the rest of my life. Curse all you shiny things! O.O

Looking forward to:
This week has gone by fairly fast, don't you think? It's already Thursday, and I've got a 9 hour day tomorrow which starts early in the morning...:I Well, it shouldn't be too bad. Then I got a 12 hour day after that which should be fine considering, I passed the disaster last week. Now it's just a matter of time going by fast enough so that summer is here.

Tanning really isn't good for you...I used to like tanning a lot because I have dark hair, but basically when you tan, it's your skin cells screaming for help, and then when you get sunburned, it's your skin cells burning to death...tragic, really. Sunscreen has become my best friend. :) The sun emits two types of light: visible light and UV light. The UV light is what burns you. And well, let's just say, the sun is what's causing people to prematurely age and have such damaged skin. I have horrible skin across my cheeks and nose because that's where I consistently get sunburned and the area is so damaged, it's sad. AND...turns out you're suppose to reapply sunscreen approximately every 2 hours...which I don't remember reading on the bottle...but yeah. And you should apply it 20-30 minutes before you go outside and turns out there's no such thing as "waterproof" sunscreen, bc after you get out of the water, you should immediately reapply sunscreen. I'd really like to NOT get skin cancer, if you know what I mean, so take care of yourself.

I wish there was a way I could read people's minds and then help them with what they need. I can't get them to open up to me, and it's so hard just standing there being helpless as their life crumbles and you don't know why, or how to help. Sigh...I'll continue this project for say a year and see if I get anywhere with my life...a year should be enough...and maybe one day, I won't have to write day what was good about the day, life will just be...good. haha, that would be nice.

aahaha, I was a bit early today, but I don't want to forget like I've been doing.

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